Stop Naming Princesses Zelda – Awkward Spaceship

September 11, 2019 posted by


I’m not anyone special. I’m not some great hero. I’m just your average guy, living in a cave, but I have a very important message for the Royal Family of Hyrule: stop naming princesses Zelda. You see, I just finished reading the entire history of Hyrule and I find it hard to believe that I’m the first person to notice that every time something horrible happens, we have a princess named Zelda. The Picori Festival is ruined by the evil Wind Mage Vaati – we have a princess named Zelda. The Gerudo King Ganondorf uses the Triforce of Power to conquer Hyrule and turn the Sacred Realm into a a princess named Zelda. The dark priest Agahnim kidnaps the descendants of the Seven Sages so he can unleash a giant pig demon from the Dark World – a princess named Zelda. We have a really mild winter – a princess named Marmalade. “But Average Guy Living in a Cave, it’s a tradition that we name princesses
Zelda after a terrifying wizard put a princess named
Zelda into an irreparable and everlasting coma.” To which my response is, “Wow, that’s a really stupid tradition.” Why would you take something bad that’s
happened and try to keep repeating it over and over
again? Oh, and don’t try to tell me that things “aren’t that bad right now” – If I get sick and need medicine, I have to get a prescription from an old man up a flight of stairs on the top of a mountain, there are only, like, four glass bottles in the entire kingdom, and my shield was eaten by a monster that looks like a stack of friggin’ pancakes! So, please, on behalf of the entire kingdom, stop naming princesses Zelda… or at least make it so I can go outside without being murdered by a bunch of rock-spitting land-octopuses. Rock-spitting land-octopi? Whatever. (music plays) You know what? Never mind. Don’t worry about me. I’ll just stay here and watch over this wooden sword until I have a long white beard. Aw, crap.

41 Comments

41 Replies to “Stop Naming Princesses Zelda – Awkward Spaceship”

  1. LazärheaD says:

    It's dangerous to comment alone, but I'll take this…

  2. daelph2114 says:

    As usual: great work! 🙂

  3. Cdude Gamer says:

    And don't name them Peach either!

  4. mandydax says:

    Octopuses. It's not Latin in origin.

    But some average guy living in a cave, Zelda is such a cool name. It starts with a Z!

  5. Ganonthegreat says:

    I don't think you quite get the joke…

  6. theolat3 says:

    As awesome as always!

  7. AdmiralGreenRabbit says:

    Uhhhh… there's only one Peach In the Mario Universe.

  8. Phil Ramsteck says:

    The octopus (/ˈɒktəpʊs/ or /ˈɒktəpəs/; plural: octopuses, octopi, or octopodes

    youtube.com/watch?v=wFyY2mK8pxk <–boom!

  9. Kierphe-Actual says:

    Hey, Average Guy Living in a Cave: Correlation!=causation.

  10. Sam Barber says:

    Snuggie?

  11. Oriandu says:

    Unfortunately they already tried not naming a princess Zelda and instead named her Tetra, and bad stuff wound up happening anyways!

  12. algute100 says:

    Awesomesauce!

  13. puellanivis says:

    Octopodes

  14. coyoteverde says:

    i had seen this joke long ago. but in video version it is funnier

  15. DuoVisen says:

    hehehehehe that was good.

  16. Nicole Hackbart says:

    I don't know why, but this is the third video ive seen today that did the octupuses vs octopi thing….. O-o

  17. Cdude Gamer says:

    It was a joke. Bad things happen to Peach all the time.

  18. reecord2 says:

    you guys do good videos

  19. Awkward Spaceship says:

    I both get and appreciate this reference. 🙂

  20. Awkward Spaceship says:

    As usual: thanks! 🙂

  21. Awkward Spaceship says:

    But look at the cost of that cool name!

  22. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Thank you very much!

  23. Awkward Spaceship says:

    What? No. It's a very expensive robe. It's definitely not a red snuggie held closed with clips on the back.

  24. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Thanksauce!

  25. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Glad you liked it!

  26. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Thanks!

  27. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Really? Weird.

  28. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Why, thank you for saying so.

  29. Nicole Hackbart says:

    I truly think its amazing that also every time I have commented on your videos you have replied back. Thanks. It always brings a smile to my face 🙂

  30. lordofthe6string says:

    Rock spitting, land octopodes*

  31. TheInuitGamer says:

    there is a back story behind this,the first zelda refused to tell to anyone where the triforce of courage was hidden, without the king's concent a magician put a powerful sleeping curse on her, but the magician died casting the spell, so she was stuck in this sleeping state, her brother was devestated and decided that every female of the royal family should be named zelda

  32. TheInuitGamer says:

    and he is dressed as an "old man" from Legend of zelda on the nes wich is one of the first zelda in the zelda multiverse timeline so it should be only the third time there is a Zelda (skyward swords, adventure of link and then legend of zelda) correct me if I am wrong

  33. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Okay, things are about to get nerdy…

    According to the official timeline in the Hyrule Historia, there were already several Zeldas since Skyward Sword, The Minish Cap, Four Swords, Ocarina of Time, A Link to the Past, Oracle of Ages/Seasons, and Link's Awakening all occurred prior to the original Legend of Zelda and The Adventure of Link (and, yes, I know that some of those games "share" Zeldas).

    Glad to see another Zelda fan enjoyed the video!

  34. Awkward Spaceship says:

    I say tomato, you say octopodes. 🙂

  35. Awkward Spaceship says:

    Sure thing, and here's my apology in advance for when I end up not replying to one some day. 🙂

  36. joegt123 says:

    ….wat

  37. Vintage Gamer says:

    You have to take into account that not only tragedy has happen just many time it happen like this in the timeline the old man is in Gannon takes over Hyrule Zelda is born link comes and saves the day with zelda until Zelda II the adventure of link comes by and they stop Gannon from rising for good.

  38. James Bentley says:

    It's all the same princess. She's immortal.

  39. Khairi Hamed says:

    It's actually "rock-spitting land octopodes".
    "Rock-spitting land octopuses" is also acceptable, regardless of what others may say.

  40. liamthecollie says:

    Marry me, Dave!  <3 </creepy>

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *